P.M.S does not stand for.....Pretty Mellow Sister!

I had a very serious issue the concerning the kids today, I literally had to call in reinforcements. It takes a village to raise a child, and I have four. I realize that I have to slow my life down drastically and take baby steps with them on every level. I am already a hands on mother but I need to be even more hands on. Right now I am helping my two oldest with their homework, and we have lots to do. I am trying to get them to use their brains and think creatively, and it is taking a lot out of me. I have to make a mental note to look up some exercises I can do to help them focus and think. Other than that, I have to finish my essay tomorrow along with some other homework. Then we have church in the evening and prayer meeting. I am looking forward to both. My emotions have been on red alert and I have had interactions with some people that I probably shouldn't have. I'm not the only one, however I can not take comfort in that thought. Once said words can not be taken back and all you can do is apologize, which I did. I have been more down than up which is to be expected given the circumstances, put on top of that being bloated and that night I said those choice words to folks I had more than my usual glass of red wine that night. No excuse though, no excuse. I am taking the necessary steps to be a better me, and have my children be better versions of themselves.